June 29 2010
Solemnity of Saints Peter and Paul, Apostles
By Beth DeCristofaro
The Lord stood by me and gave me strength, so that through me the proclamation might be completed and all the Gentiles might hear it. And I was rescued from the lion’s mouth. (2 Timothy 4:17)
He said to them, “But who do you say that I am?” Simon Peter said in reply, “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.” Jesus said to him in reply, “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah. For flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but my heavenly Father. (Matthew 16:15-17)
Piety
Another morning and I wake with thirst for the goodness I do not have. I walk out to the pond and all the way God has given us such beautiful lessons. Oh Lord, I was never a quick scholar but sulked and hunched over my books past the hour and the bell; grant me, in your mercy, a little more time. Love for the earth and love for you are having such a long conversation in my heart. Who knows what will finally happen or where I will be sent, yet already I have given a great many things away, expecting to be told to pack nothing, except the prayer which, with this thirst, I am slowly learning.
(“Thirst” by Mary Oliver)
Study
“You are the Christ, the Son of the living God,” says Peter. Jesus revealed that God gave Peter the insight to recognize him. God moved this man in unlooked for ways and he recognized the living Grace before him. Later, of course, Peter denied that he knew Jesus, thereby denying God.
Sometimes I wonder how to recognize God. What should I do or which path should I choose? How do I know God’s desire for me? “God,” I pray, “can you write down what you’d like me to do in this notebook at the side of my bed?” Sometimes I feel that if I choose the wrong thing then I will lose out or thwart God’s will which would then be a denial much like Peter’s.
I think Peter’s example shows me that choosing an unqualified right way is less important than to be open to God’s revealing mercy and love. God’s grace is given and within me, within us. Before we reach for God, God reaches for us. There are many paths to take and they can all lead to God if my deepest desire is for God. Peter messed up pretty badly even after Jesus had recognized and named him but still became the Rock of God’s community on earth. God’s mercy, love, forgiveness and wisdom is revealed in the many chapters of Peter’s life.
Action
Piety, study, action are invaluable tools for me to know God. What is going on within? Is it my self-will propelling me or through study, piety and action can I be in touch with God’s mercy and movement each and every day? I don’t have to necessarily do it “right”. Jesus just wants me to accept that by saying “yes” to him in the deepest places of my heart. God will then take me the rest of the way.
When did I deny Christ? Did I turn back with sorrow and remorse and accept God’s mercy? God wants to break the chains that keep us from God and rescue us from the lion’s mouth of our own self-will.
