Wednesday, August 15, 2018

“Forgive Seventy-Seven Times” by Beth DeCristofaro

“Forgive Seventy-Seven Times” by Beth DeCristofaro


The word of the LORD came to me: Son of man, you live in the midst of a rebellious house; they have eyes to see but do not see, and ears to hear but do not hear, for they are a rebellious house.  (Ezekiel 12:1-)

Peter approached Jesus and asked him, "Lord, if my brother sins against me,
how often must I forgive him? As many as seven times?" Jesus answered, "I say to you, not seven times but seventy-seven times.
(Matthew 18:21-22)

Piety
Our Father, forgive my trespasses and help me forgive those who trespass against me.  Help me to be more compassionate and responsive to those who I might hurt or I do not notice are hurt. Make of me one of your children whom you love and who longs to love you in all ways.

Study
Forgiveness.  I’m working on it.  Somehow, I seem to miss the mark even when I thought I’d sincerely forgiven.  However, when the person who I “forgave” does something else (or even the same thing!) my outrage is truly larger sized than it should be, clearly coming from anger or hurt which was not in fact given over to God.  This isn’t to say forgive and forget because each of us has the right to protect ourselves from future danger or exploitation.  But full forgiveness is to turn over to God as first creator and final judge the pain, desire for revenge, desire to be right or whatever, even if I have to do that seventy-seven times.  It is grace which empowers me to do so.

In Matthew’s Gospel from Tuesday Jesus told his followers to be as little children which gives me a clue of how to work on forgiving.  Children are, as a rule, good forgivers.  Just look at the inconsistent and irrational way even the best of parents treat them.  Yet children look for parents, hugs and nurturing despite missed expectations.  And how frequently little “best” friends upset each other only to recommence play as if nothing happened.  For children, relationships and basic needs surmount the overthinking adults do as we ration out forgiveness. 

Today our nation struggles with the need for much forgiveness.  We blame the refugee who flees abuse for invading our space forgetting that God made the land and the sea, not the boundaries.  We blame poor people for their poverty refusing to admit that our plenty comes from having things, contacts, and resources to which they have no access.  We blame people of color in disproportion for infractions – even if imagined – out of our inherently biased system.   And over the many years, our church has blamed victims for the abuse and oppression caused by its leaders.  One by one we can make the difference by acting to change things and practicing forgiveness for each person seventy-seven times as my daughters did while I raised them, as they did for their bestie friends who hurt their feelingsIt is what Jesus did with Peter, Joseph of Arimathea, Augustine and countless other saints on whose shoulders we worship and live.

Action
What places of outrage remain in you for hurts, slights, crimes, rejections?  Pray for yourself to give over to God.  Pray to forgive yourself if necessary.  Pray also that those strong emotions be transformed through God’s grace into action for good, an action for healing, an action for forgiveness.

Illustration: “Reconciliation”, by Josefina by Vasconcellos, shows two former enemies embracing each other.  One statue is displayed at the ruins of St. Michael’s Cathedral in Coventry England while its twin is displayed in the Peace Garden of Hiroshima, Japan.


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