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| Image by John Hain from Pixabay |
“Build
One Another Up” by Melanie Rigney
Therefore, encourage one another and build one another up, as
indeed you do. (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
I believe that I shall see the
good things of the Lord in the land of the living. (Psalm
27:13)
They were all amazed and said to one another,
"What is there about his word? For with authority and power, he commands
the unclean spirits, and they come out." (Luke 4:36)
Piety
Lord, help me to consider my
words and let them reflect Your Love.
Study
This time around, it started off
nicely enough, a conversation about our summers and mutual travel experiences.
Lots of smiles, a few nods, and laughs. I congratulated myself; maybe this time
with this acquaintance would be different. Maybe the judge-y remarks, not just
about me but about those we were with, wouldn’t come. Maybe it was the start of a friendship.
The next day, the two of us were
with a group of people. I made a comment in passing about a conversation I’d
had with someone else. She stopped me to say I had shared information that I
shouldn’t have. I tried to explain that what I had said wasn’t exactly top-secret, classified stuff. But even when others agreed, she wouldn’t let it go.
I gave up and became silent.
The following day, we were preparing
for an activity when she proceeded to tell me I was going to do it all wrong—not
that I’d done anything yet, not that she was providing instruction, not that
anyone’s life or salvation would be in danger. In essence, I told her to back
off. Her reaction was to tell people for days how nasty I’d been to her. A
couple of people contacted me to say she’s had a troubled life, and so we just
need to accept her as she is.
The more I thought about it, the
more I thought both they and I were wrong. Returning fire for fire surely isn’t
the answer and is a mode of action I still default to too often. I recognize
that. I work at it. But neither is saying nothing. Paul’s words in today’s
first reading advise us to “encourage one another and build one another up”;
sometimes, that involves loving correction. My acquaintance and I would have both
been far better served if I had listened rather than reacted if I had asked
questions about what was behind her comments—Fear? Perfectionism? Rightly
placed concern about my past actions? Then we might have had a true
conversation. And that is what I will strive for in future encounters, not only
with her but with others I find difficult to love.
Action
Listen before
speaking in a difficult conversation today. Encourage and build up rather than
tear down.
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